In case you need a reminder, we’re officially deep into “cuffing season”–the time of year when you feel you’d do anything to have someone to spoon with during the cold winter nights. Or maybe what you really want is just a plus-one to bring to holiday parties and family gatherings. As Latinas, we can receive a disproportionate amount of pressure from our families to find a novio that they’re convinced will make our lives complete.
However, if you didn’t already know, being a single lady during the holidays can be absolute ecstasy. There are tons of perks that come with being single around the holidays–or any time of year, for that matter. To provide some counter-programming to the omnipresent “cuffing season” narrative, we’ve compiled a list of behaviors single Latinas are known for.
Check it out below.
1. Sleeping Pretty Much Diagonally Across the Bed
Yes, having someone to snuggle with when you’re freezing is a perk of being in a relationship, but stretching out like a starfish across your mattress is arguably even more satisfying. Instead of being smooshed onto the edge of the bed while your partner takes up more room than one body has any right to, single ladies get the luxury of having the whole bed to themselves. Not to mention, there’s no blanket tug-of-war with your lover. When you’re single, sleeping like a baby is pretty much a guarantee.
2. Getting Your Nails Done
Out of all the activities single Latinas like to indulge in, getting a relaxing manicure is definitely up there. And for a lot of Latinas, the longer, the better. Getting a manicure is one of those things single Latinas do to show themselves they’re worth it. Who needs a man to make you feel loved when you can do that all by yourself. You’re worth it!
3. Chisme with Your Tías
The great thing about being single is having more time to spend with family, as all your time isn’t being occupied with the boyfriend. That means, catching up on months worth of chisme with your tías. Sure, we don’t like it when the gossip slips into the mean-spirited kind, but for the most part, it’s fun to swap secrets and stories. Among Latinas, chisme is very much a bonding activity for Latina women. It’s something single ladies always look forward to doing.
4. Bingeing on Pan Dulce
How many of us have heard from our female family members that the way to keep a man interested is to “watch our figure”? Because of harmful messaging like this, so many Latinas feel embarrassed eating “bad” food in front of their significant others. Walking by a particularly fragrant panaderia can feel like torture when you’re on a health kick. When you’re single (and you’re worried less about how you look naked) it’s liberating to just let yourself eat cake. And we won’t judge you if you do so in large quantities.
5. Man-Shopping at Sunday Misa
We’ve all done it–been at church and have silently checked out the eligible young men when we’re supposed to be praying. It’s arguably the perfect environment to score a date–everyone’s dressed up, smelling good, and on their best behavior (or trying to be). What could be more Latina than finding future bae at misa?
6. Ceasing Shaving Altogether (And Loving It)
As we know, Latinas come in all shapes, sizes, and colors, but there is a prevailing stereotype that most Latinas aren’t exactly smooth and hairless naturally. When you’re in a relationship, hair removal can be a pain in the ass (literally). Most Latinas have gone through life waxing, plucking, shaving, tweezing, and Nair-ing ourselves into bald oblivion. But when we’re single, the razor becomes less of a daily practice and more of an anomaly because you don’t have to worry about your mustache rivaling your boyfriend’s or your partner complaining about your prickly legs under the sheets. For hairy Latinas, it might only take a day or two of putting down the tweezer to grow your very own Frida. And you know what? It’s liberating. Frida was genius in more ways than one.
7. Buying a New Outfit for Every First Date
It’s hard to say what we look forward to more when we have a date: meeting a potential love interest or shopping for an outfit beforehand. A lot of the time, shopping wins out. All bets are off in a long-term relationship, but on a first date, Latinas love to present the best version of themselves. There’s nothing more a Latina loves than hearing from her date “You look incredible” and responding, “Oh, this old thing?”
8. Creating a Fake Instagram Account to Stalk Your Ex
Yeah, we’re that girl. Obviously, we’re dying from curiosity about what our exes are up to, but there’s no way we want them to know the extent of our interest. So like any sane person, it’s completely reasonable to create a fake Instagram account in order to stalk your ex’s Insta-stories un-detected. Because we know we look through every single person who watched our story to see if anyone interesting stands out. And we’d hate to give our exes that satisfaction.
9. Refusing to Let a “Spicy Latina” Comment fly on Tinder
Like many single ladies, Tinder, and all dating apps in general, a hobby, a pastime, some could even say a way of life. But for every hottie you match with and have a decent conversation, there’s about one hundred who can’t wait to tell you how hot they find Latinas, attempt to speak to you in (crappy) Spanish, and telling you how they love their women “spicy”. Luckily, our mamas have raised us not to take disrespect lightly. When a man starts to bring up his Latina fetishes, we shut that down. Quick.
10. Listening to Selena Songs on Repeat
As a single lady, it’s empowering to be able to play whatever song you want, whenever you want, wherever you want–no input from a judgmental partner who thinks their taste in music is better than yours (you know the type we’re talking about). And nothing says “Independent Latina Who Don’t Need No Man” better than Selena Quintanilla. There’s something so comforting about listening to Selena songs on a loop–it’s a guilty pleasure without the guilt.
11. Belting Girl-Power Anthems in the Shower
There’s no time we feel the full extent of our liberation more than when we’re in the shower, belting out a canción at the top of our lungs. When we’re in la ducha, we’ve practically transformed into Mariah Carey. Anyone that says otherwise…we don’t know her. When we’re really feeling ourselves, you’ll catch us reciting the lyrics to Bebe’s feminist manifesto “Ella” and getting goosebumps at how good we sound.
12. Wearing Whatever You Want
Hetero Latino boyfriends can be known for their overt displays of machismo. For many Latino men, toxic machismo manifests itself through controlling behavior. We’ve all had those friends dress conservatively because their boyfriends won’t “let” them dress otherwise. As a single Latina, we have no such obligation. If someone so much as makes a comment about us not wearing enough clothes, we might just perform a strip tease to make a further point. Regardless of relationship status, our bodies are our own, but there’s no time we feel that more strongly than when we’re completely single.
13. Spending a Ton of Time With Your Amigas Because You’re Not Prioritizing a Man
From a very young age, Latinas are programmed to believe that romantic relationships should take priority in our lives. This creates the unfortunate habit that many Latinas have of dropping their friends once they get into a serious relationship. But falling in love with your girl gang all over again once you’re single is worth the cost of heartbreak. Latina friendship is the best kind of friendship.
14. Pretty Much Living Off Your Ma’s Cooking
What Latina doesn’t love to go home for the all-you-can-eat buffet that is cena de domingo? As a single Latina, eating food your madre cooks is too good to pass up. After all, cooking for one just isn’t practical! It’s too hard to half or quarter recipes and we often end up throwing out our leftovers when they sit in our fridge too long. Why spend hours on meal prep when you’ll be coming home with a Tupperware (or three) of sobras from your madre’s house?
15. Having a Set-Response To “Y el novio?” at Family Gatherings
Latino families are notorious for being overly “concerned” about our relationship status. That’s why most Latinas have a game plan for dealing with nosy family members. “Y el novio?” “Not anymore, but I’m much happier.” “Y el novio?” “I’m taking time to work on myself for now.” We know what to say to shut down a conversation. If nothing, la familia has helped us develop one heck of a thick skin.
16. Crushing on a New Guy Every Five Minutes
Another great thing about being single? Checking out whomever you want. The hot guy on your commute. The barista with impeccable banter. And don’t forget that Adonis with the bulging muscles at the gym. Sure, we have times where we wallow in self-pity at being single, but there are other times where we bask in being surrounded by man-candy and feeling free to flirt without guilt. And if there’s one thing Latinas are good at, it’s getting our coqueta on.
17. Pretty Much Living in Sweatpants
Except for occasionally venturing out in heels with the girls, being a single Latina means #sweatpantlife. It’s one of the many things about single life that’s significantly more physically comfortable than being in a relationship is. When we’re by ourselves, we’ve got nothing to hide and no one to impress except ourselves.
18. Become Way Too Invested in Telenovela Storylines
Sometimes, when you don’t have a love interest to distract you, it gets a little too easy to get invested in a fictional one. Telenovelas may be melodramatic and outrageous but damned if they don’t know how to lay the romance on thick. No, we don’t have a partner to make out with, but we can certainly imagine ourselves as the woman Aaron Diaz is professing his love to.
19. Referring to Your Pet as Your “Hijo” or “Hija”
Even if our madre y abuela are begging us to get married and pop out babies, we know we can’t rush ourselves into a commitment before we’re ready. Until then, we’re perfectly content with babying the hell out of our mascotas. No midnight feedings, diapers, or tears–just fur and paws. And yes, we might dress our dogs in adorable onesies, because who’s going to stop us?
20. Being Genuinely Happy That You’re Blessed with the Time to Get to Know Yourself
For all the buzziness of terms such as “self-care” and “self-love”, we know that these ideas are more than just a trend. Independent Latinas know that a partner can never complete us and true happiness comes from within ourselves. A well-adjusted single Latina uses her single time to work on herself and experience the liberating feeling of what it’s like to be truly, fully, independent. In the immortal words of Hailee Steinfeld “I love me. I love myself and I don’t need anybody else”.
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