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Finding out you’ve been cheated can feel like having your heart shredded, gut filled with mud, and dreams completely trashed and stepped on all at the same time. The worst part? Even after the two-timing is over, or your relationship has seen the end, the pain of the betrayal tends to stick around for quite some time.
Hip-hop and Trap reina, Cardi B, knows this well. After confirming the rumors of her fiance Offset’s infidelities the “Bodack Yellow” rapper recently revealed to Cosmopolitan that she had decided to stick things out with her man. It was a decision that had many conflicted. Some criticized the Dominicana from the Bronx for staying with a man who’d disrespected her, others praised her for acting on her own emotions. No matter what you think of her decision, Cardi’s latest single ‘Be Careful’ reminds fans that when it comes to her emotions she’s still a “regular, degular, schmegular” sensitive Latina like the rest of us and that her heartbreak over her partner’s cheating comes just as real.
Here are the stages of coming to terms with cheating as told by Cardi B:
1. “I wanna get married, like the Currys, Steph and Ayesha shit”@iamcardib / Instagram
Cardi’s opening line which centers around the potential she saw in her relationship, before the cheating, is beyond relatable. This one, in particular, is for all the women have ever pictured a partner waiting for them at the other end of the aisle only to have that image shattered by the news of their betrayal. These days it seems that even despite Offset’s cheating the rapper remains committed to obtaining her happy ending with her guy. Her man, her choice— here’s hoping Cardi, like the rest of us, gets her happy ending and the respect she deserves.
2. “Gave you TLC, you wanna creep and shit”@iamcardib / Instagram
After the pain of discovering that a partner has cheated on you, it’s pretty easy to remember the times in your relationship where your relationship had you smelling like roses. You know, the times when treated your partner better than they treated you.
3. “Poured out my whole heart to a piece of shit”@iamcardib / Instagram
Anyone who’s ever found themselves going through the grieving process of their partner’s cheating has probably sobbed a similar line while in the shower. Welcome to the beginning of the angry phase.
4. “Man, I thought you would’ve learned your lesson ‘Bout likin’ pictures, not returnin’ texts”@iamcardib / Instagram
Ah, the line that speaks to anyone who has ever had to fire warning shots at her man and draw the line for him on what she counts as disrespect. The infuriating part is when your requests for respect and advisory were not heeded.
5. “Said that you was workin’, but you out here chasin’ culo”@iamcardib / Instagram
With the discovery that you’ve been cheated on comes a stage of deep reflection. Of course, it’s not always healthy keeping tabs. But around this time you start counting up all of the lies you heard, all the sus behaviors and adding them up to the steaming load of B.S. that your partner served you with. It’s all part of the healing process, we get it, just don’t spend too much time combing through his Gram for more evidence that you already have enough of. Your time is better spent.
6. “I could’ve did what you did to me to you a few times”@iamcardib / Instagram
Cue the curtains for the phase in which you reflect on the moments where you were the stronger partner. Reevaluating and reflecting on the moments that suggest that you deserve better than a cheater is key.
7. “But that’s not my M.O., I’m not that type of bitch”“Bartier Cardi” / Atlantic Records
Every relationship has its ups and downs, sure, but through the rollercoaster, you were able to hold onto your morals and push through the temptations. This, can be one of the most infuriating and simultaneously rewarding parts of the grieving process. Infuriating because you’ll remember all of those options you passed up on. Rewarding because deep down you know you made a decision to be respectful to your relationship (unlike some damn fool you know.)
8. “And karma for you is gon’ be who you end up with”“Bartier Cardi” / Atlantic Records
Nothing loves cheating like karma does. Cardi B’s lyrics welcome us to the petty AF stage anyone who’s been cheated on definitely deserves to go through.
9. “I gave you everything, what’s mine is yours@iamcardib / Instagram
With these lyrics, Cardi sums up one of the more practical thoughts a person can have after discovering they’ve been cheated on. Of course, we always want the people we love to do what they want with their life, but this never discredits the resentment we can hold when we know that we’ve given relationship our all while our partners have failed to give it the same respect in return.
10. “I want you to live your life of course”@iamcardib / Instagram
Of course, we want everyone to be happy. It’s hard when they cheat though.
11. “You even got me trippin’, you got me lookin’ in the mirror different”@iamcardib / Instagram
It can be easy to slip into a phase of misplaced self-loathing once a cheater gets revealed. That’s because having a partner be unfaithful to you in such a destructive way can bring out a slew of insecurities you might not even know you had. Suddenly you can start to blame yourself and think about how you could have better.
12. “Yeah, my heart is like a package with a fragile label on it”@iamcardib / Instagram
Folks, meet Belcalis. She might have brand new teeth, red bottoms, and a new whip, but she’s just as vulnerable as the rest of us. Like us, Cardi B might be an Amazon goddess but at that end of the day, she’s also human. Heartbreak is heartbreak and even the best of it can fall victim to its agony.
13. “You might have a fortune, but you lose me, you still gon’ be misfortunate”@iamcardib / Instagram
This here for anyone who has ever been cheated on ever and is the ultimate PSA for cheaters: be careful you might be riding high now but you’ll be a mess when you realize what you’ve lost.
14. “You still stutter after certain questions@iamcardib / Instagram
The crushing moment you hear the lie come out of his mouth is awful.
15. “You keep in contact with certain exes”@iamcardib / Instagram
16. “But I hope you get what you dyin’ for”@iamcardib / Instagram
17. “It’s gon’ hurt me to hate you, but lovin’ you’s worse”@iamcardib / Instagram
Cardi B brings us to the decision making the phase of the cheating healing process with this line that anyone who’s ever had to deal with a breakup can likely understand.
18. “You gon’ gain the whole world But is it worth the girl that you’re losin’?”@iamcardib / Instagram
Making the decision to stick around and see if things get better or leaving and having to make the journey of healing that comes after a breakup is a hard choice to make.
19. Yeah, it’s not a threat, it’s a warnin’@iamcardib / Instagram
Even if you know your thoughts are ridiculous, or would never let a friend get away with similar mindsets. Fortunately (hopefully), after some reasoning, you move onto new phases where you realize that your partner’s cheating isn’t your own fault. You’re smart, clever, beautiful and everything only a class act, noncheating, partner deserves.
20. Yeah, my heart is like a package with a fragile label on itAtlantic Records
The important thing is to remember in the end, your heart will heal. And you’ll find better.
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