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Things Every Peruana Eats, Drinks And Does At Her World Cup Party

Every Peruvian with a beating heart and a love for soccer has been trembling with excitement since Peru qualified for the World Cup in a win against New Zealand. Of course, we already go ham every World Cup, but now that our team has made it through, we’re on the edge of our seats.

Still, even despite the fact that this World Cup is taking place in 2018, many men can’t help themselves when it comes to questioning Latinas and our devotion to the game. Sure, for as long as I can remember, my ma and my tías have been the ones in the kitchen at every World Cup party, furiously prepping food, while my tíos chilled outside with the beer and meat. But don’t get it twisted, machismo and the like be damned, Peruanas go just as crazy when it comes to rooting for a World Cup win.

Yeah, you can catch us in the kitchen making the ceviche but you best believe you’ll soon see us in the living room, screaming louder than anybody else when Cueva screws up a penalty kick.

Here are eight things that many of us extreme Peruana soccer fans experience during the World Cup.

1. Guys prep for stats quizzes, but mijo, you’re wasting your time. 

American Idol / Fox via Giphy

Yes, I have a favorite player. Yes, I know his jersey number. Yes, I I know the last time Peru played in a World Cup. Yes, yes, yes now cállate and let me watch the game boi.

2. I get shit for calling it soccer. I say, you need to move on.

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Oh “real Latinos” call it football? Good to see you’re still struggling to come up with the times, bro.

3. Oh, you think I only watch to see some ass? Cute.

radioexitosape / Instagram

While you have your eyes set on the screen watching for tetas during crowd shots I’m putting in some real work and crossing my fingers that Guerrero wreaks some havoc.

(And FYI yes, I did notice that bum is looking super worked out this year. So what?)

4. Ceviche is all the morning after power fuel my World Cup party needs.

Vivo.com / Giphy.com

The INCAN Superfood, and the rest of y’all fakers that say it’s not originally Peruvian can TAKE SEVERAL SEATS. Lime, cilantro, onions, salt, fish…I mean, could you ask for anything better? Pro-tip: If you down too many brews during the game, drink the Leche de Tigre (aka the delicious, lemony broth) before bed and the next morning for breakfast. Instant hangover remedy. Thank me later.

Oh yeah, a little camote, a little choclo…Sew. Gewd.

5. P.S. I’ll be downing Alcoholic Libations like a real dama.

Credit: Naomi Villagomez Roochnik

Fallen soldiers of the first half.

Step aside, muchachos, and let the ladies show you how a real Peruvian keeps the World Cup party going. The thing is, if we’re going to be dedicating ourselves to something other than the game you better believe it’s gonna be the pescado and carne. So we go for beer. So. Much. Beer. And non of that fancy craft nonsense either. Good beer. Well…OK beer. Let’s be real, it’s Corona. Common misconception: Peruvians drink pisco sours. Huh? I mean, maybe if we’re having a super special gathering and we’re trying to impress that one bougie tía, but pisco sours require work and time and…whipping egg whites?

Gimme las cervezas.

6. And you better believe I’ll be hoovering the carne.

Boin / Giphy.com

You know we’re getting our parrilla on! Yep, the fools on the couch might be chill with subscribing to their assigned male gender norms but what they don’t know as that those of us cooking it up in the kitchen are delighting in first dib taste testings. Oh yeah, we’ll also be kindly whipping up enough meat to send each attendee home with a nice, full to-go plate (because if your guests can’t take leftovers, did you even throw a real party??).

BTW: Ignore judgment from foodies that say the steak is supposed to be rare… Real Peruvians cook their meat crispy and well-done.

7. Corn is everything when it comes to our World Cup meals. Don’t get it twisted.

Credit: Naomi Villagomez Roochnik

Cancha AND choclo! Cancha is this delicious, salty toasted corn, that’s kinda like the middle stage between a kernel and a popcorn. Such crunch, much yum. Serve that with a little queso viajero. Also, choclo. I think wypipo call it “maize” or “hominy” or something? Whatever, it’s like regular corn on steroids and it’s so much more satisfying to eat because you can literally pop giant, starchy kernels into your mouth at a time! Also, serve it with a side of queso viajero.

Choclo and *raw* cancha. Warning: DO NOT EAT CANCHA LIKE THIS. You will crack a tooth.

8. Yes, those are my tíos screaming at the TV screen.

Credit: Naomi Villagomez Roochnik

I have no photographic evidence of the screaming because I’m sorry but I WAS SCREAMING TOO, THERE’S NO TIME FOR PICS DURING THE HIGH STAKES MOMENTS (Thanks a lot, DENMARK). Instead, please enjoy cute Peru-swag pictures:

9. And yep, THOSE are my tías doing it even better.

Naomi Villagomez Roochnik

TFW you wanna watch the game but someone needs to cook the rice… Pour one out for all the tías and ma’s out there who keep us fed

Feliz partido to my Peruanas waking up early to catch the game on Thursday! Vamos Perú!

10. Inca Kola:

pureperu / Instagram

I think deep down we all know this shit is nasty. It’s Peruvian Mountain Dew. Neon yellow, sickly sweet, tastes like… bubble gum? Still, this is the nectar of our childhoods, and I’ll be damned if I don’t serve it at every party. The adults have Corona, the kids have Inca Kola.

11. Chicha Morada

totorabcn / Instagram

 Speaking of sickly sweet beverages, this liquid corn goodness is the original purple drank. You boil purple corn with cinnamon, cloves, lemon, and sugar and you’re rewarded with this tasty refreshment. It’s sort of like Peruvian sweet tea. You can buy this in bottles, like we did for convenience’s sake this past Saturday, but the real OGs (aka my mom) boil their own.

12. Carbs on carbs on carbs:

aromasbrasa / Instagram

There will be rice AND corn AND maybe even some yuca too, and there will absolutely, undoubtedly, without question be POTATOES. Orange camote, yellow camote, purple papa, yellow papa, white papa…we’ll eat it all. Fry it, boil it, chop it up, dehydrate it, rehydrate it, stuff it, put a wig on it and take it to prom, WE DON’T CARE. Show me a Peruvian that doesn’t eat potatoes and I’ll show you a traitor.

13. Peruvian chicken

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 If you haven’t been blessed enough in your life so far to have tried pollo a la brasa, why are you still reading this? Go, now, immediately, to your nearest Peruvian joint and order pollo a la brasa and prepare yourself for crispy, salty, mouth-watering chicken heaven. American rotisserie chicken should be ashamed of itself knowing there is such a superior chicken on this earth. Now, this chicken is legit hard to make. Unless you have a roasting spit in your home, you’re gonna get this from a restaurant. A classic Villagomez move: order this, pick it up, and place the chicken in a fancy crystal dish. Nobody’s REALLY gonna believe you made it yourself but it’s slightly less tacky than serving it in the styrofoam it came in. That being said, my mom served the chicha in Halloween paper cups, so I guess she shouldn’t really care about tackiness.

14. Kitchen chisme

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Anything juicy and/or nasty and judgemental is being said in here as potatoes are peeled and onions are chopped. My tía straight up called my Mom fat very matter-of-factly (“si que te has engordado mucho, no?” to which my mom responded, “si, y tu también, no?”). Yeah, it’s kind of weirdly patriarchal and antiquated that all the women are in the kitchen, but at least you get to hear the best shit talking. Until it’s directed at you, of course.

15. Weird furniture.

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There will be too many people in the living room and not enough couch space. Not a problem! Bring in the lawn chairs and old, plastic folding chairs! If you are under the age of 12, don’t even THINK about taking a seat anywhere but on the floor, because you have not earned the right to comfort yet. And don’t worry about spilling food on the couch if you leap up during an important play: of course, every last piece of furniture is draped in protective covering. In our case, it’s long sheets of polka dotted fabric. So chic.

16. Short people.

Credit: Naomi Villagomez Roochnik

Pretty sure not a single one of my tios is over 5’4, and my tias are goblin sized. We were cursed to walk this earth as small folk, BUT we get the last laugh because we pay less for our kids-sized shoes. Your move, tall people.

My mom’s tiny foot and my brother’s paw compared to a non-Peruvian appendage

17. Random Peruvian Trinkets

hennadjane / Instagram

 Llamas, alpacas, dolls, and, of course, Tumis, our version of bling. No, it’s not some weird voodoo god, it’s an Incan thing, you wouldn’t understand.

18. People staying way after the game is over.

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Some relatives might even spend the night if they’ve hit the bottle too hard. Don’t be alarmed if you see a snoring tio on the couch the next morning. He’s just sleeping off the Peru loss.

19. No dessert.

ponypig28 / Instagram

This ain’t no dinner party! Since there’s no real set time for lunch, people just sort of grab food as it’s ready or as they’re hungry. Dessert signifies the end of a party. This party has no end. People will still be eating plates of meat and rice at 9PM. One of my tíos did bring a package of alfajores to the Saturday game, but it wasn’t saved for the end of the meal.


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The Spanish ‘Star-Spangled Banner’ Is Being Shared To Honor Hispanic Workers Fighting COVID-19

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The Spanish ‘Star-Spangled Banner’ Is Being Shared To Honor Hispanic Workers Fighting COVID-19

There’s no denying that the world looks a lot different now than it did in 1947. And while the list of all of the positive changes that the decades stretching between now and then have done for the world and minorities, a recent campaign is also highlighting the ways in which our current president could take some notes on certain values the United States held dear during this time. Particularly ones that had been pressed for by one of our former presidents.

As part of Franklin D. Roosevelt’s “Good Neighbor Policy” effort, he worked to promote positive and healthy relations between the United States in Latin American countries.

At the time Rooseveltaimed to ensure that the North, Central and South American countries avoided breaking under the influence of Axis countries during World War II. As part of this campaign, Roosevelt comissioned a Spanish and a Portuguese version of the U.S. national anthem. According to Time Magazine he also “recruited Hollywood to participate in this Good Neighbor Policy; Walt Disney went on goodwill tour of South America, hoping to find a new market for his films, and ended up producing two movies inspired by the trip: Saludos Amigos (1942) and The Three Caballeros (1944). The Brazilian star Carmen Miranda also got a boost, and her role in The Gang’s All Here made her even more famous in the U.S. And alongside these cross-cultural exchanges, the U.S. government decided it needed an anthem that could reach Spanish speakers.”

According to NPR, Clotilde Arias, wrote wrote the translation at the end of World War II, was born in the small Peruvian city, Iquitos in 1901 and moved to New York City to become a composer when she was 22-years-old. Her version of the anthem is now part of an exhibit at the Smithsonian Institution in Washington, D.C.

Now in an effort to support Latino communities affected by the coronavirus, the non-profit We Are All Human Foundation’s Hispanic Star campaign commissioned the a remake of the song.

Hoping to raise awareness of its Hispanic Recovery Plan and efforts to help to connect Hispanic small businesses and workers with resources during the pandemic, the campaign brought the old recording from obscurity.

For the song, the 2019 winner of the singing competition La Voz,  Jeidimar Rijos, performed “El Pendón Estrellado.” Or, “The Star-Spangled Banner.” 

The song has already received quite a bit of comments and support on Youtube.

Hang in there, fam. We can only get through this together.

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These Online Botanicas Will Satisfy The Bruja In You

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These Online Botanicas Will Satisfy The Bruja In You

With young Latinxs reclaiming the bruja identity, the demand for access to novenas, herbs and other specially crafted ritual tools has grown tremendously. Luckily, these Latinx-owned online botanicas have made it easy for brujas, or anyone who wants to dive deeper into the practice, to get their hands on the goods. Whether you’re looking to conjure up more cash flow or secure some extra protection from those pesky mal de ojos, these shops have the magia you need.

1. The Flowerchild Bruja

You know you’ve received some real tesoro when you open your delivery and see the holographic cellophane. Unmistakable and unique products are what make The Flowerchild Bruja’s shop un cielo de flores. Garden Smudge Sticks adorned with colorful flowers and loose herbs packaged in clear hearts make this online botanica a must-visit if you’re looking to manifest more love and beauty into your life.

2. Brooklyn Brujeria

No forlorn-looking saints and pale stricken Marys here! Brookyn Brujeria offers a fresh and modern take on the classic bruja necessity of novena candles. At $10 a candle, you can enhance the vibrations and style of your space without blowing all your chavo. With intentions like Boss Bitch and F*ck Outta Here, these ain’t your abuelitas’ novenas.

3. The Hoodwitch Store

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Thank you for all of your love & support to those who have been readers and customers of @thehoodwitch over the years. ♥️You know truly how hard I work and that this is my livelihood and culture. Visual art and magic ARE my life and practice. Not a peach flavored “turquoise” glitter drink. My magic is in my blood, my magic is in my ability to bring life to my visions, it is creation & destruction. Over the last 6 years, I have been so honored and lucky to be featured in some of the largest media publications internationally not limited to Instagram. This is bigger than that and the creative team for Starbucks knew that. I have personally worked on consulting large companies in their design concepts this work comes naturally to me. “So what’s the big fuss?” My personal style has become synonymous with the visual aesthetic of my brand. No, I absolutely did not “invent” the crystal balls nor acrylic nails but What I created was a space for myself along with other POC to feel represented and have visual imagery that was representative of us. The colorful candles of my local botanicas, my gold jewelry, and my long nails clutching my crystals are certainly not “new” but to see them presented in a manner that I shared visually in this space was. Katherine de Vos Devine @devosdevine is a lawyer and art historian who wrote a powerful and insightful look as to what exactly is happening with this situation and we are sharing it in our story today because more than anything she truly gives the full tea of the situation. I can strip away the crystal balls, the nail art, and delete all of my beautifully curated photos but I will always be me, I will always be my grandmother’s voices and wisdom. I will create, and I will always know my value and my worth. I trust and believe that my ancestors and my guides are looking after me. These giants may have the money to bully artists, creatives, and small business but we know the truth and absolutely must not allow it. As a small business owner, I appreciate you standing with us in this uphill journey and even if it goes nowhere, at the end of the day I can laugh to myself knowing that Starbucks made a drink inspired by HW 🔮

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If you’re in the market for an obsidian scrying mirror, unique tarot decks or nail polish for your mystic manos, then The Hoodwitch Store is your one-stop bruja shop. Be sure to also check out the Bruja Bookshop tab, where you’ll find vintage, one-of-a-kind libros to up your witchy wisdom. The shop offers some rare finds en español as well. However, make sure you stay up to date on the latest inventory. These goods sell out fast!

4. House of Intuition

If you live in LA, you’ve most likely heard of House of Intuition. With four brick and mortar stores throughout the area, plus an online shop, it’s probably a wise investment to grab one of their “Success” intention candles. Their beautifully colored novenas aren’t the only reason to check out the shop, though. Seriously, this casa is staked with everything from crystals skulls, cauldrons and wands to a line called “Hair Mystics” featuring crystal-infused hair mists. You’ll be glad your intuition led you here.  

5. Lunar Magic Shop

Lunar Magic Shop is the super affordable and super thoughtful shop with some of our favorite bruja apparel. You will for sure want to grab the “My Mom Will Hex You” tee for the little one in your life or the “I Am My Own Sacred Place” one for yourself. While you’re at it, you might as well secure the “Motherhood”and “Student” crystal kit bags. This small shop definitely has the whole family’s brujeria needs in mind.

6. Curandera Press

While this shop is currently taking a small hiatus, they will re-launch on August 1. This gives us time to save up for a big vela haul. We could all use some divine intervention with lazy lovers and bad hair days, right? With Curandera Press’ “No Mas Amante Perezoso” and “Good Hair Day” velas, your prayers are answered. We’re excited to see what intentions they roll out next.

Read: In These Trying Times, Boricua Bruja Emilia Ortiz Provides A Digital Space For Healing

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